Hello! Seiiti Arata. How great is your potential? You’ve surely heard someone saying, “If I did it, so can you!” Does that make sense? It depends on your choice of focus.
Those who are enthusiastic about self-help, coaching, neurolinguistic programming and the like usually place their focus on the possibility. That is the “If he’s managed, then I can, too” line of thinking.
The other side of the coin is to focus on the difficulty. It is determinism—the idea that in some situations fate has already been set, and a fragile person will never get there unless they have some kind of outside help.
1. You can always choose to focus on either possibility or difficulty.
The choice is yours. We will see the benefits and risks of each one.
When we place our focus on possibility, we believe that we too are able to achieve the same results as others have managed to achieve.
The advantage of this belief is that it motivates us to go after things. Many people fail to achieve results simply from lack of initiative, and so this choice may be helpful, giving them the push they need.
Be careful: The risk is being deluded by believing too much in possibility when the chance of accomplishment is very small.
When we focus on difficulties, we weigh things, and that helps us avoid the frustration that comes with hasty actions.
Another advantage of focusing on the difficulties is that we develop solidarity and willingness to help others. When we remember how difficult it can be to overcome difficulties, we are more willing to give a helping hand to those who need.
Be careful: The risk lies in giving up on something when fatalism and victimization kick in, before making a whole-hearted attempt to achieve the goal.
2. Use reasoning to find out what is useful in each point of view.
When someone achieves a certain result, the only thing they are proving is that it is possible to get there.
Note, however, that there is a difference between “possible” and “you will surely get there, too”.
By logical reasoning, evidence that another person has achieved something does not imply that anyone (you, in this particular case) is guaranteed to achieve it, too.
“If I managed, so can you” is an oversimplification that doesn’t take into consideration individual and the contextual differences.
But even if there is no absolute certainty that you will also get that same result, it’s always good to have the example of those who have achieved it as a reference. This inspires us to try and get similar results, and it can show us the paths to follow.
Do not waste time and resources by trying to reinvent the wheel. Instead, study to absorb existing knowledge. Take advantage of the learning that will take you to the path that has been walked by successful people, whatever that means to you. Actually, this is the next tip:
3. Seek the elements that contribute to success.
Clearly define what that desired success is. For that, see our episode 27 of the series Hello! Seiiti Arata, on how to set goals and objectives that work. Visit http://arata.se/hello27
If a person has achieved a result, it’s possible to find and study the factors that contributed to that result. We can seek to replicate and follow the same model.
Remember that people are different, and contexts are also different. So let’s not make a robotic copy, but rather look for the principles behind the results and adapt them to our individuality and our context.
Take a look at how we are evolving in this quick video: instead of taking the “If I managed, so can you” approach quite literally, assuming that you need to copy me in the (false) hope of achieving the very same result, you need to remember something very important:
4. Do not stray from yourself.
Never set your authenticity aside. The blueprint for success is always a simplification. You cannot replicate someone else’s footsteps exactly—there is a unique context surrounding each individuality. Therefore, to wish for the very same results is an illusion and an offense to your authenticity.
Keep the balance between who you are and the reference you are using. Whenever you are studying a successful person’s mentality, remember to adapt it to your individuality. I repeat: only YOU can define what success is. When you work out what success means, try to understand how people who got there usually think. How they make decisions.
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In my case, to get all the results I’ve achieved in my love life, my professional life, my financial life, my health, my diet, my communication—everything!— I’ve always gone through a conscious process to find references and then study, model and apply them in accordance with my values, my principles, and my individuality.
You can do the same thing. You can overcome challenges, exceed limits, silence the critics, and prove to yourself that your potential is huge. Somewhere down that path you will come across people who will give you ready-made scripts, telling you, “Follow these steps exactly to get the same result as I had.” Try it, but with caution. Do not stray from yourself.
Here on YouTube and also within the Arata Academy courses I don’t pass on to you the same steps I took. That would be silly—it’s an illusion. I could tell you where I was born, where I studied, what I said, what I did, but you would never get the same result as me because the context is different. Your identity, your values and your personality are distinct.
What I do is much better: I collect the best role models and turn them into questions, reflections, so that you can always absorb it all in a natural and authentic way. I want you to learn how to listen to yourself, to refine your own style. I don’t want you to become someone’s clone.
Be the best version of yourself. Arata Academy: your continued improvement. For those who want to start now, I invite you to visit the link http://arata.se/focuscourse